Dear creepy guy who comes into the corner market,
I really, REALLY wish you would stop trying to talk to me. Why do you do this? You don't know me, I'm sure that you can tell I'm not interested. I never speak to you even when you speak to me, and I act as disinterested as possible. You're like some freak in a bar who won't take no for an answer- get away from me! I don't know or like you. You freak me out; it's gross, because even though I can never tell if those kids are yours or not, I feel bad for them and I KNOW you're way too old for me.
I know I look older than I am, but only by a few years and you have got to stop this. I haven't told anyone what's going on because I'm a little embarassed, but more than anything I wish you would make your next attempt in front of the cashier who I know from school because I know he would go ballistic if he witnessed you hit on me. Just STOP this innapropriateness because you make me completely uncomfortable and my mother has been waiting since I was in kindergarten to beat the crap out of someone who bothers me.
SERIOUSLY,
The UNDERAGE girl you will. never. have.